If marriage has taught me anything, it has taught me to serve.  I remember when the Lord started dealing with me about the servant’s heart.  Oh my Lord!  I could have screamed every time the Holy Ghost tapped on my shoulder and said, ‘Serve!’ With time it became easier and now I can say, two years later, that I don’t even think about it.  Thank you Jesus!

The discussion of submission and headship always arises when we talk about marriage.  The order of God is clear that the man is the head of the home just as Christ is the head of the Church, but that same Bible says that the husband and wife are to submit one to another! (Ephesians 5)  This means that even though the man is the head, he is not to Lord it over his wife. The Bible further urges the man to live in consideration of his wife (1 Peter 3:7).  This means that it’s a collaboration. The two work together, discuss issues, come to conclusions together…etc.  Of course there are times when the man should make a decision for his family, but this should only be when occasion calls for it, not all the time as if the wife’s opinion, thoughts and ideas do not matter.

Anyway, back to servant-hood.  Luke 22:24-27 says this:

’24 A dispute also arose among them as to which of them was considered to be greatest. 25 Jesus said to them, “The kings of the Gentiles lord it over them; and those who exercise authority over them call themselves Benefactors. 26 But you are not to be like that. Instead, the greatest among you should be like the youngest, and the one who rules like the one who serves. 27 For who is greater, the one who is at the table or the one who serves? Is it not the one who is at the table? But I am among you as one who serves.’


Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus (Phil 2:5)….

When it comes to marriage and family you need to there as one who serves.  This should be so for both husband and wife.  We may serve in different ways and different areas, but our hearts should take the posture of a servant. It is unfortunate that in many homes the dispute of who is greater is still taking place.  Husbands are lording it over their wives and exercising their authority in ways that make the woman feel oppressed instead of loved.  Conflict is the only thing that can come out of that.

However, if each person stands in their God given position with a heart of service, then we will make much better progress in the home.  Loving and submitting will become easier and submitting one to another will be the order of the day.  Let us follow the example of Christ in our homes; let us be there ‘as one who serves.’ Then Christ will rule in our homes and we will see his hand in everything we do.

Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus….I am among you as one who serves!